{"id":1332,"date":"2012-10-08T14:05:03","date_gmt":"2012-10-08T20:05:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.questforlifecoaching.com\/?p=1332"},"modified":"2015-12-17T11:38:39","modified_gmt":"2015-12-17T18:38:39","slug":"the-who-what-and-how-of-apprenticing-part-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.questforlifecoaching.com\/?p=1332","title":{"rendered":"The Who, What, and How of Apprenticing: Part 2"},"content":{"rendered":"

Who do we apprentice?\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

This is the chicken or the egg question. Which comes first? Does the mentor choose the apprentice, or does the apprentice choose the mentor? The answer is both. Ideally the mentor initiates with the apprentice. Yet in Star Wars the ‘jedi mentor’ Qui Gon Jinn finds his ‘padawan apprentice’ Anakin by accident. Either way, I encourage folks to initiate. Go after what you are looking for, or be what you have never received!<\/p>\n

The systemic problem that we have had through the ages is that there are never enough mentors, or as Paul calls them, spiritual moms and dads. In I Cor. 4;15 Paul says, “There are a lot of people around who can’t wait to tell you what you’ve done wrong, but there aren’t many fathers or mothers willing to take the time and effort to help you grow up.” \u00a0 <\/em>That means that we need to become what we are looking for. If we wait around for a mentor in our work place or a spiritual mom and dad in the church to apprentice us, we may be waiting a long time and never find what we are looking for. That is why I am so passionate about apprenticing. I am committed to investing in a few people and places for a lifetime<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Healthy apprenticing starts as an organic or relational journey between two people. So often we have an epiphany that we need to disciple or apprentice people, so we quickly default to the implementation of an ‘apprenticing program or system.’ \u00a0We assign people to one another for mentoring, \u00a0recruit people for mentoring classes where we tell people how to mentor, or try to mass produce apprentices through meetings where we dispense information. This is backwards,\u00a0hard to sustain, and will not produce the desired results.<\/p>\n

Another obstacle to apprenticing is that most of us feel like we are not a ‘jedi’ mentor, so we think we don’t\u00a0have\u00a0much to offer, no less the confidence to invite a ‘padawan’ into an apprenticing relationship. Yet the truth of\u00a0the matter is that we don’t have to be an expert or have it all together to apprentice. A good mentor is simply an available friend who is a few steps farther down the road and is willing to pass on the little that he or she has learned.<\/p>\n

Many folks have been hurt by overly authoritarian leaders who abused them, or absentee types of leaders who abandoned them, the consequence being a disdain and avoidance of any forms of mentoring or apprenticing. Leading in any fashion is like a rash, and the distrust of leadership is high.<\/p>\n

Healthy apprenticing is not a hierarchical relationship in which all the advice and wisdom flows one way from the guru down to the apprentice. It is a relationship of mutual learning. Neither is it a relationship in which the leader controls or manipulates their apprentice to puff up their ego or use the apprentice to accomplish their agenda. A good mentor comes alongside his or her apprentice to coach them to be all that they were created to be and do.<\/p>\n

The first step for leaders is to observe where people are already connected to one another in their business, church, or organization. We don’t need to force relationships. In every community, church, or business, there is a tapestry of relationships where people are connected in circles of two or three. It is not hard to spend time with people you like. This is the starting point for developing an apprenticing culture. Here are few questions to help people discover who to mentor or who to be mentored by:<\/p>\n